I go through these periods of feeling uninspired. When I write it is because I want to or need to. So often I have spoken about the Pandora's box of my life. How I have seen too much to go back and just be that plain Jane sort of gal. The doting wife, who adores her husband and trusts him implicitly.
Not much has changed from that mentality for me. However as life never fails to be uninteresting, fate brought me some one new recently.
While most men are nothing more then snowflakes melting on the window of my life I had hoped this one would not befall the same set of circumstances.
I was trolling good old craigslist bored out of my mind one day and found an ad. It was supposedly an Uncle and Nephew seeking a threesome with a BBW.
My curiosity was piqued to say the least. Just to find out how an Uncle and Nephew got into sharing women together. Come on, you know even if you find it disgusting you are a bit intrigued right? lol
So Woody, the Uncle replied to my email. He sent me his nephew's phone number as well as his. I decided to call Junior and see what the deal was. I knew if he was young enough he wouldn't be able to resist my charms and would tell me the truth. Well, as usual it was a lie. They are not Uncle and Nephew just good friends who swing together.
However I had such a good rapport with Junior that I decided to proceed with talking to them both and meeting them. Junior and I have six degrees of separation all over the place. Same friends, work places etc. But I just couldn't stay away despite the risk of someone we both know finding out what a naughty girl I am.
The threesome was exceptional. One of the best sexual experiences I have ever had. Both men were engaging and kind, complimentary and very attentive.
After the experience I knew I wanted to keep in touch with them both. At first I thought that Junior and I would have more chemistry then his older counter part. I was surprisingly mistaken. Woody and I both love music especially older genres. We found a comfort in playing the old Daddy, daughter roles and started to live out some of our fantasies together.
I was comforted by his age and experience as well as his over all concern for my well being and life.
The second time we were together not a word was spoken between us but the sex was powerful. I left the door open and pretended to be asleep in bed. All dressed up like a good girl, pigtails, white little tank top and panties with rainbow trim, holding my blanket and teddy bear tightly as I sucked on my thumb.
He snuck in and wasted no time in taking full advantage of my body. Especially my ass. He spared no niceties as he spanked me and fucked me. Scratching and biting my back, ass and thighs. He re-entered my ass over and over again to make sure I knew it was his fuck toy. He then made me suck his cock and lick his balls and ass until he cam. It was a perfect money shot, right on the tip of my tongue. By the time he was done, my pussy was dripping wet. I was completely soaked. He covered me up with my blanket and handed me my teddy. As soon as he left I rolled over and in no time my pussy was pulsing and coming very hard.
Of course he left me two beautiful gifts on my night stand. A DVD and Music CD with artists he knew I loved. Both were adorned with pictures of me and the artists he put on the discs. It was such a beautiful gesture.
Every day even though both of us busy with our real lives we made sure to check in with one another. He had invited me to attend parties with him and I was glad to come as "Daddy's Little Girl." I had even planned some special things for the first party as he was going to make sure one of my very dark and dirty fantasies was going to come true.
Then today of all fucktarded days. Valentine's Day jammed right into the middle of perfectly good sex. I had expressed to him that I was also dating "Regular" men. But this morning I got a dissertation about whether or not I expected anything from him because of the date. Really? We aren't dating. This isn't high school. He doesn't need to buy me roses and a balloon to keep fucking me.
Just like I have heard men say about women, "There are guys you fuck and guys you marry."
I was loving our rapport and friendship. The fantasy was so much fun why the fuck was he complicating things?
Later that day the deadly "I need to talk to you" text came. It was more Valentine's Day fun. But this time it was horrific. I was in the middle of a busy day with my daughter as I usually am mid-week and he is laying into me because I sent the party organizer for the first party we were supposed to a message. I treated him like I would treat any man I didn't know who sent me a solicitation with out reading my profile and with out using the right head to think of something even remotely clever to say to me.
Now Woody was berating me via text about me not trusting him and why I wrote it.
I am sorry when did we become a couple? Last time I checked I was a single woman. Let me make sure - yeah the left side of my bed still empty, checking account still just one name on it and oh yeah that ring finger still bare.
I am sad. Because I thought I finally found a man who understood me. I can care about people with out being in love with them. While I may choose to give up complete control at times that doesn't mean I am some stupid wilting mush who has no opinion or spinal cord.
Fact is I am choosing to give up my control. I am just really disappointed. I thought I finally found some one I could be really comfortable with. Some one who wouldn't judge me or treat me like I am some idiotic slit.
The whole thing upset me. I had to contain myself from crying in the middle of my daughter's weigh ins.
I may never find what I want. But I thought finally I soft place to land. Some where to be safe and some one to be safe with.
I still am unsure as to how I want to handle this. Any man who has done this prior with out having a serious stake in my life has been shown the door. I am torn.
